How do you deal with a partner that is a flirt? In my case, I would be that partner. I am a flirt. I have always been and don’t see that changing anytime soon. To be fair I let you know from day one about this flaw in my character. What do you do when your partner is a flirt? Do you think it’s all harmless?
While I personally think flirting is fine there is however “flirting etiquette” that should be followed. If your partners flirting is hurting your feelings then you should respectfully ask them to stop. Here are some ways to talk to and deal with a flirt.
[I] Use “I” not “You”
Don’t accuse your partner. Do not use angry words. Tell them your concerns in terms of how it affects your feelings. Clearly phrasing your concerns and making sure your partner doesn’t feel personally attacked helps them see things from your perspective. This will help you reach a compromise.
[II] One topic at a time please
Flirting is an issue that should be handled on its own. There is the potential for enough drama without any extra baggage. Resolving issues takes time. Don’t let your partner make you feel like it’s all in you head. What you feel is never just in your head.
[III] Somethings got to give
So you have had that talk with your partner. They agreed to stop but yet after a few days or weeks they do it again. Now they know how you feel because you have clearly explained yourself to them. Yet they continue to flirt. Obviously they do not care about you nor respect you. It’s time to reconsider the relationship and flirt with the idea of moving on.
[IV] Is it you?
I know, I know. How can I even go there. The thing is you have to make sure you are not over reacting before you get to that last straw of leaving someone. Just do a quick pro/con check list first. That is all I am saying. Ask yourself are you just a jealous person?
[V] The cure for jealousy is trust
I think one of the most distasteful things that can happen in a relationship is the formation of jealousy. People do not change but behaviors can. If you trust your partner flirting should not bother you. Unless it is not simple flirting and it crosses over to just plain disrespect. Compromise is the key to a long healthy relationship. Once you put trust first you may find out that there is nothing to be jealous about.