Everything you say and do is judged. Even if you speak no words; perception is 90% of reality so expect Criticism. There is no getting away from it. It’s something that comes with the territory of life. Now that is out of the way. Let’s focus on how to deal with criticism.
Dealing with criticisms is far from an easy thing to do. When someone gives criticisms take a moment to think before you respond. If it’s positive, just say thank you. Don’t gloat! If it’s negative or worse criticism for who are; don’t respond in kind. That does not mean shrug it off or internalize it. Here are some tips for dealing with criticisms.
[I] Evaluate the situation before you react
Just take a second to think about what is being said. Is it constructive criticism or is the person just tying to be mean? I know it’s hard but you have to look at the situation objectively. Criticism, even those that are meant with good intentions can hurt. Try not to be too sensitive.
[II] Put away the teddy bear and pause the double rainbow song
Feelings get in the way of clear thoughts. If the criticism is from someone you’re in a relationship with; you need to express how you feel to that person. Most importantly you want to make sure they understand and also acknowledge what you feel. This is not done for confrontation but rather to open conversation. Now if the criticism is from your boss or someone you work with; you need to say the following “Thank you for the feedback. I will take note of it in the future.” Say it just like that, don’t ad lib.
[III] Line in the sand vs. Shoot out
First some clarification. A line in the sand can be moved. Its not permanent. A shoot out on the other hand is final. Yes, you should stand up for yourself and set boundaries but not the same boundaries for everyone. You should tell people if they are crossing a line within reason. The thing is the line is different for each person and situation. Where the line gets crossed should be in your head. If you think someone has reached it. Let them know politely. Then if they don’t get the hint, leave the room, end the call or even end your relationship with them.
[IV] Turn the tables on the critic
Getting criticized by people is a fact of life. Man up! Better yet take it in and use it to your advantage. By turn the tables I do not mean criticize them as well. I mean really listen to what they are saying to better yourself. There is always a kernel of truth in all criticism.
[V] What, hold up. True facts
If the criticism damaging set the record straight. make sure people know the truth. Don’t pick a fight just lay down the facts